Walter White is an Exotic Shorthair Cat who goes by the name Der. He has a little abnormality with his tongue that he uses to his advantage.
Author and Interviewer: Der’s Handler “Jinx”
There has been quite a bit of commotion around Der’s celebrity status lately, so we thought it would be a good time to create a little website about him.. People need to get to know “the cat” in his truest form.. So we took the Interview approach. Yes, we interviewed our cat and here is what he had to say….
Der, can you tell me a little about yourself? “I am a cat. Is that little enough?”
Tell me how you ended up with the Etling family? “I can not remember to well- when I was a wee kit. Hmmm, let’s see.. Yes, I remember now. I was handed to them. That is how I became theirs. Once I was placed in the arms of the young hairless ones, I was never put down.”
Do you like the Etlings? “Sure, they are alright.. The family is large if you include the llamas.”
Can you tell us how you spend a typical day? “I sleep a lot. I can not express enough how important catching a few Z’s can be to fur growth and claw maintenance. When I am awake, I spend a fair amount of time around the Etlings. They pet me, groom me and follow me around with a camera.”
Do you like having your pictures taken? “Yes. For kicks and giggles – I sometimes I roll that tongue out quite far and give the camera what it wants. Then the photographers run off giggling as they look at the photos they took. I like to make them happy. I get treats, sometimes Fancy Feast.”
What is your most favorite pastime? “Eating. Sleeping is a close second. Oi, I can not pick… I also enjoy inserting my hair on folded black sweaters, unused towels and on kitchen counters”
What things do you not like to do? I like to watch them (the Etlings) shower. (Note: Der’s tongue was extended as he replied) However, I do not like getting wet. I do not like the sound of hair dryers/blowers, vacuums, blenders, dust busters or food processors. I loath electrical cords – keep those filthy things away from me. I do not like having them dangled near me.
What’s your superpower, or what’s your spirit animal? “Do you really need to ask? With this facial appendage – I am able to travel between alternate realities. If I so chose, I can insert the time travel chip and go back into time. I recently altered history in my favor. It has been noted: They are preparing more Fancy Feast for me. My goal of feline obesity is greatly improving.”
Who is your role model, and why? “I aspire to be more like Lil Bub. That hip cat has done something special with his fame. People love him for that – along with his quirky looks. He has it all figured out, you know? (Der takes a long pause, sighs) I would like to meet the guy..”
Do you believe your time here on earth has been a success? “Hmmm, that’s relative. Eh. I have failed and I have achieved… I do get the most toys, however…Oh, I shouldn’t have admitted that I know that.. Yeah so”
Last Question. If you could share with out readers, who are not with us today, what your voice sounds like- who would you compare it too? This Guy Ya, I have the accent from my handler.